are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Randomize
