You work out of a Hotel?
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
