It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I may still return these pants. Depends how much they smell like alcohol by tmrw morning. I've already spilled once.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
