I'll pay for our taxi if you let me makeout with the drummer and we don't leave RIGHT when the bassist does.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
Randomize
