how many princess gummy vitamins will it take to negate last nights drinking binge?
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Randomize
