What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
that is very illegal...i love you.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
Randomize
