Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize