She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Randomize
