she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
