I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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