new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
