So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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