when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Randomize
