Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
operation harelip BJ is a go
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
