Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
