Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Randomize
