She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I'm passing your future prison.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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