I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
Randomize
