Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Randomize
