But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I got a call from 999 999 9999. I didn't answer it because I was too busy freaking out about the number.
It was probably Jesus.
I feel like he would have left a message.
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I just masturbated and watched youtube makeup videos, which was just an extension of masturbation.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
