Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
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