i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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