So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize