I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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