that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I miss living with her. She was the only person who was a bigger train wreck than I am.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Randomize
