I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
I don't know when he had the time to do it but he dug a hole in our basement like the shawshank redemption
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
