ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
