Me too!
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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