I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
It's rum buckets o'clock
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Randomize
