I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I swear to God, I saw my life flash between my legs.
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Randomize
