He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
is it bad that I'm more worried about having to take out my piercings than the fact that I might be having a kid
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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