I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Randomize
