I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Worst case scenario- he paid me for sex with meatloaf. There are worse thing, right? I mean at least is was good meatloaf.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
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