Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Randomize
