Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
yeah, i found the sharpie that everyone use to sign my tits last night. its dead.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
I'm a freaking penguin. one mate for life, and really awkward at parties
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