I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
