We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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