i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Randomize
