Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
My homemade mace ate through its aluminum container. I make awesome mace.
I am just glad I was home to catch most of it, cause it smells BAD.
I'm not a scientist but that could be because it's homemade mace. That is however just a hypothesis
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
So it turns out "let's pretend to be gay so guys will stop hitting on us" was step one in her plan to get me into bed...
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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