Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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