How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
I'm fucking sick of guys. I think I'm going to date myself. No drama. And I know I'll always put out.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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