dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Your friends are scaring the cats so I'm going to smoke weed with them to call them down.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
Randomize
