i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
Just so you know, you called at 2 last night and kept making me tell you that I loved you and then when you got home you thanked me for walking you home. Incase you forgot, I'm still about 200 miles away.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
