His pick-up line from last night: "I bet you cant climb these stairs right now." Needless to say.. it worked.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
The amount of pregnancy tests I've taken in my life is unhealthy
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
