I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I just googled if crying burns calories
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
Watch out for the bush at the end of your steps. it comes out of nowhere
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
