dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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