How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
As long as you keep bringing fries home, i'll keep being naked when you get home
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Randomize
