You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
She called to say her plane was running late and i had 30minutes to get to the airport for bathroom sex
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
