Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
