would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
she insisted that i refer to her boobs by name.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
You handed J your Mayan-pocalypse shopping list and told him he wasn't getting laid unless he brought everything on it. Where is he supposed to get a live goat?!
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize