Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
Just met another girl you fucked but this time in seattle. Your cock gets almost as much mileage as jet blue. Anaheim and seattle both say hi, figured you don't remember their names.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
